Wednesday, June 9, 2010

June 9, 2009

I didn't sleep well last night. That's probably another Hep C related thing, but it could also be due to my age (perimenopausal). I am hoping for a better day today, but that's not up to me. I just have to get up and get moving then take it as it comes. One of the most difficult aspects of my journey has been the overwhelming sense of loss I've had. I've lost my health (which was always excellent), my ability to work in the way I'd like, my ability to be a reliable person, my dreams and goals for the future and most importantly HCV has affected my relationships. Some people just can't hang in and be friends with a "sick" person, especially when it's a long haul. I'm at 4-1/2 years now. That's a long time to be sick.

It's especially difficult for my family. I haven't told them about the blog and probably won't. There's a Universe of topics that are censured in my family and they are all related in some strange way to my disease.

It's another dreary day outside which echoes the way I'm feeling on the inside. I'm hoping the sun will come out and I can have a turnaround soon.

June 8, 2010

I've had 5 full days in bed now. This is what HCV is like for me - I have periods of feeling relatively well followed by periods in which I struggle. My symptoms are body aches and pains, nausea & vomiting, diarrhea, horrible headaches and pain in my right upper abdomen. The worst is FATIGUE. It's not one of those things that are simply "mind over matter" and you can force your way through it. I've found that I must listen to my body and when it says rest, I REST. I have many ways in which I cope, but for the most part - HCV has ruined my life. I'd like to hear your stories and try to develop an online support group for those infected with HCV and those who care for people infected with HCV. As a Nurse Practitioner I can also offer some helpful tips for symptom management.