Sunday, July 11, 2010


I attended an actual church service today (by choice!) for the first time in many, many years. This journey of life is mostly spiritual, and there's nothing like a life-threatening illness to force you into reflective thinking about "religion." I was raised a fundamental Baptist and I can tell you, that's not for me. My husband and I raised our children in a non-denominational church that we LOVED and was perfect for us until a major shakeup changed it's course, and we quietly left (as did many others, some not so quietly). Since that time I do not attend church at all. If I enter an evangelical-type church I feel triggered and traumatized. So, it's a brave thing for me just to go when I have no idea what to expect.

As I was lying in bed more than not over the last 4-1/2 years, I've had plenty of time to assess my spirituality. I am not going to go into detail here because it's such a personal topic and I don't want to offend. But I believe it is absolutely necessary to reflect on our spirits and what this life is about, whether you choose organized religion or not. I don't think anyone EVER arrives at THE ANSWER that is 100% correct; in fact, people who do really scare me. There's always mystery. Always. And for me, that's part of the beauty in it.

I loved the church I attended today, just loved it. I had thoroughly researched it ahead of time and it was perfect for me. I wrote a letter to church leaders asking to meet so I can get my questions answered. There were many friendly faces there. Who'd have ever thought, but I think I'll be joining this church. It's just so right for me at this period of time. I hope each of you also finds your perfect place, and that's so deeply personal. But the important thing is to simply seek. Be a seeker and find your sacred place where your soul is nourished.