Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Chronic ilness & Isolation; a diagnosis

Have you ever called a person's home and someone answers, "may I ask who's calling?" while you imagine the answerer walking to the person for whom the call is intended saying "so-and-so is on the line" only to return to and say, "no, s/he isn't home" and there you sit on the other end wondering if they just didn't want to talk to you. I sure have and I try to think the best, but sometimes the feeling isn't good. Something like this happened to me this morning. Now I will admit to over-thinking tendencies but thus is the life of the chronically ill. People avoid you. I know this for a fact. Very few are comfortable -really comfortable- being around someone who is sick and dying even when they are doing normal things and having fun. The experts say to tell folks what you need, but I have not found that to be particularly helpful. When I tried to do this once, a "friend" told me she didn't want to be my friend anymore. I'm not trying to whine, just state fact. I'm strong enough to not let this get to me in the long haul, but it's annoying. It's not like I'm going to poke myself in an artery and spray blood all over you. Jeeze.

Good news is that I have been feeling better. It always helps when they find out what's wrong with you! I had an infection in my bile duct (second time) that spread into my bloodstream. That knocked me out from the 7th until last week, nearly a full month. I'm on the upswing now. I'm still weak and tired, but once again - like the Energizer bunny - I'll keep on going. It's a beautiful day and I want to soak up every second I have. I hope your day is wonderful as well!