Friday, August 5, 2011


I've been gone awhile because 1. I've been feeling GREAT! and 2. I was on vacation. I'm so glad to have the month of June behind me - it was awful but I've been consistently well since then with just a smattering of difficult days, and had a wonderful, relaxing vacation.

I've been seeing a grief counselor through hospice - I think I wrote about that before. While I was on treatment in 2006 and 2008-9, life did not stop around me. I missed a whole lot. Mix in some very difficult losses, such as the death of my dearest friend and I realized I have so much grieving to do. I actually made a list of all the things I need to grieve and have neglected to attend to. I would highly recommend working with a grief counselor to resolve these issues - it has been very helpful for me. For anyone living with chronic illness, there is great loss. Those who are healthy and have friends with chronic diseases need to understand how difficult this is. What can you do? The most important thing, IMHO, is to not forget your friend. DO NOT FORGET THEM.

A couple of long-time friends asked me out for breakfast earlier this week. I didn't realize the purpose of getting together was for them to scold me about not asking for help when needed. They confided that many people want to do something, but are at a loss as to what would be helpful. And...people are afraid to call you at a bad time. I didn't realize these women cared. I really didn't. I thought they had forgotten me! But it's just that difficult reality of them not knowing what to do and when it might be needed. So, I promised to reach out in the future. That's something I need to improve upon.

Last night, I went to my HS reunion. We don't have them on traditional years (10, 25, etc.) because our town has a huge festival in August and so many come "home" to attend the events and visit families. We've been doing this for years now, but last night was the first time I've gone since my 10th year anniversary (which was well over 20 years ago). It was fun to see people I once knew and then stare at those who you recognize but can't place. My class had 523 graduates, so it was difficult to know everyone. I woke up thinking that it was so good I got to go and I am not sitting here today grieving the fact that I was too sick and missed out. I hope that
that will sound familiar for those of you struggling with illness; and I hope those of you who are healthy realize how much little things count. If you have a friend who is ill, send them a card. Give them a call when you have time to really listen (nothing worse than being told "gotta go" every time you talk to someone), or take them out to breakfast and scold them for not telling you what they need.

Wow, I'm one lucky gal!